Top 10 Things You and Your Wife Fight About from All Pro Dad

Read this article today and found it very insightful. Many marriages (including my own) go through seasons were it seems that everything, regardless of how small, can turn into conflict with your spouse. Here are two great suggestions from the article:

Money
Sit down together and work out a budget. Agree to take a look at expenses every month. If the meeting is pre-arranged and you both come to the table with 100% transparency, then the conversation about money can move from the emotional and into the practical.

Family communication
“You never talk!” “You never listen!” Well, it’s easy to be distracted, so try this
- No TV during meals
- Dedicate 30 minutes every evening to “conversation with coffee” (or the beverage of your choice)
- Go through a book such as “201 Great Questions,” and actually schedule time for a tête-à-tête every day

You can read the entire article here:

Top 10 Things You and Your Wife Fight About | All Pro Dad

How I've Been Spending My Saturdays

Union City Green Dragons

At the time, I wasn't quite sure what I was thinking but looking back I'm sure glad I choose to coach my son's soccer team. Although trying to coach 3, 4, 5, and 6 year old boys can be very daunting (sort of like hurding cats), it truly is a blast! It was especially fun this weekend since Ethan scored his first goal.

Ethan

The Biggest Threat To Your Marriage

Recently I came across this article that really confirms what I have seen over the last few years in so many marriages. I hope this isn't your situation but if it is, don't wait...get the financial help you need now!

If you tracked the rate of debt in America over the past 50 years and compared it to the rate of divorce, they’re virtually identical.   In fact, according to Dave Ramsey, of the couples who divorce between the ages of 20 and 30, 80% cite finances as the primary reason.  The way you and your spouse handle money has a direct impact on the health of your family.

So if your finances aren’t what they should be, where should you start?  With Steve Martin of course!  Then, you need to figure out how to get out of credit card debt and how much to save.  Love your family enough to get your finances in order.*

*Taken from www.allprodad.com

Spring Break Fun!

This past week, the kids were off from school for Spring Break. So we decided to have a "staycation" (a vacation at home for the unenlightened). So I took two days off work and got to hang out with the family. On Wednesday we went to Great America. This was the first time for the kids and they had a great time (it was also my first time since high school). I found out that my stomach can't handle what it used too. On Thursday we spent the day in Vacaville with my parents. On Friday we stayed home and played games. On Saturday we went to Gilroy Gardens for more rides...after the 8th ride on the Silver Miner Roller Coaster, I had to get off or risk losing my lunch.

You Are Invited

9 Things You Need To Know About Your Pastor

Found this article recently that really sums up a lot of what being a pastor is all about. Hope it gives you a little insight into my life as a pastor. Enjoy!

1. He’s trying his best You may not believe it. You may think he’s just throwing things together, but he isn’t. The results may not be what want, but I’ve never met a pastor yet who didn’t want to succeed. He’s preaching the best sermons he can come up with, empowering the best volunteers he can find, and doing whatever he can to try and get you excited about your church. Whatever is bothering you about your church, trust me, he’s more frustrated than you are.

2. He works harder than you think he does
You may work more hours than he does, but you’re not working harder. His mind never shuts off. He’s planning sermons, making phone calls, and doing visits. He’s always on call, he’s counseling, providing care, and being a husband and a dad. And every time he gets ready to finally take a break his phone rings with a call from somebody in the church. The emotional strain of pastoring wears him out.

3. He’s rarely 100% confident
He works really hard to come across as confident, but most of the time when he is pitching a new idea or casting vision, he’s only kind of sure. He hopes it works, he hopes it was God speaking and not his head, but he’s learned that waiting to be 100% confident will never come when you are working for God.

4. He has an ego
I’ve never met a great pastor yet, who doesn’t have a little bit of an ego. He has to. When he walks into a church that hasn’t grown under the last 5 pastors, there has to be a part of him that believes he can do something the others couldn’t. After enough people tell him “They aren’t getting fed anymore” he has to have something inside that believes he is a great speaker. Some pastors can be egotistical maniacs, but every great pastor has to have a little ego in them.

5. He’s worried you’re going to leave
It doesn’t matter if you’ve been at the church for 20 years, pastors feel like you are just one conflict away from trying another church. He probably shouldn’t be so defensive, but he has seen too many people walk out the door over small, silly things. The feeling of disappointment when someone leaves his church is impossible to explain to someone who has never experienced it, especially someone who is leaving.

6. He takes things personally
Even when you preface your statement with “Don’t take this personally, but…” I know in your mind it’s just a church, or it’s just a service, or it’s just a sermon, etc. But to him it’s his life, calling, and identity. When you say you don’t like the music, or that you’re leaving because no one has befriended you, he takes it personally because you’re talking about his family. It would be like if someone said to you, “I really love you and want to still hang out with you, but I don’t want to hang out at your house anymore because your kids are crazy. Don’t take that personally because it’s your kids not you, but we’ll have to hang out somewhere other than your house." That’s what it feels like.

7. You get on his nerves sometimes
Don’t take this personally, but you can be annoying sometimes. You probably don’t realize how fickle, or temperamental you are, but when you want to meet to talk about something “really important” and you tell him that you’re frustrated because your daughter didn’t get a solo in the Christmas play, it’s annoying. Sometimes it can feel like the loudest people are the least involved, and that’s even worse. Which leads us to the next thing you need to know…

8. Your encouragement matters (especially Monday-Saturday)
You will never know how much your encouragement lifts his spirits, especially during the week. While your encouragement of his sermon on Sunday is nice, sometimes it can seem less genuine, but when he get’s encouragement during the week he feels like you really care, and during your busy day you were thinking good things about him.

9. He would take a bullet for you
He would take a bullet for you, even if you wouldn’t take one for him. He has a burden for you because God gave it to him. He prays for you, he cares about you, and he would do anything he could to make sure that you know God. There are times when you feel like maybe your pastor doesn’t care about you, but it’s not true; he does. He may not get to speak to you or he may miss a visit sometimes, but if he didn’t care about you he wouldn’t be your pastor.

Taken From: http://forwardleadership.org/article/9-things-you-need-to-know-about-your-pastor

9 Years and Counting!

We just finished celebrating MSC's 9th Anniversary. It was a great time. We baptized 5 new followers of Jesus! I still remember when we used to have a total of 5 people at our Sunday gatherings back in February of 2003 so for this community of Christ followers to grow from literally a handful to over 175+ people in these years is an amazing accomplishment. I truly love the people of our church. They have been so gracious to me, my wife, and kids. They have allowed this young, immature pastor who started at the age of 22 to "learn on the job." Below are some pictures and also a video that Andrew put together for the services.